It was appropriate, given my last post, that I should watch England's alternately dazzling and comical game against Croatia perched next to a pair of extremely knowledgeable American lesbians. They admired “Cole's overlap play” like the girls on the other side of me admired James's torso when he took his shirt off at the end. If this is the result, I am thoroughly in favour of women taking an interest in sport: insight to the right of me and lust to the left.

Oh, yes. Almost forgot. Eng-er-land!