Our former colony across The Pond preserves the tradition of duelling suitors in its own special way:

“The parking lot of C & W Auto Glass was the scene of a violent automotive encounter Monday, when two Godfrey men repeatedly rammed vehicles in a quarrel that broke out over the affections of a woman…

“…The vehicular tangle broke out between Charles A. Bonney, 63, of the 6400 block of Godfrey Road, and Victor L. Harris, 36, of the 1800 block of West Delmar Avenue, at 12:26 p.m. Monday in the business’ parking lot in the 6300 block of Godfrey Road.

“[Sgt.] Wells [of Madison County’s Sheriff’s Department] said an ‘ongoing feud’ over a woman precipitated Monday’s incident.

“‘What we are being told is that Harris was in Bonney’s driveway, just up the road. Bonney saw Harris leaving the driveway, and Harris went down to the parking lot. Bonney followed him down to the parking lot and started ramming,’ Wells said.

“‘Witnesses saw Bonney ram his black Chevrolet Camaro into Harris’ white Acura Integra three times, and they saw Harris ram Bonney back two times’, Wells said.”

Check out that age difference.

“Okay, here’s the pitch: Bonney is an ageing French aristocrat transported forward in time from the 12th century court. He meets a modern woman, discovers Viagra, but, despite the efforts of his streetwise buddy, still can’t shake off the moral codes of his time. I’m thinking Sean Connery for Bonney and Jamie Foxx for the black sidekick.”

“Hmm. Right now Foxx is a little too hot for our budget. But we might be able to stretch to Ice Cube.”

[also via Fark]