MMR vaccine chancer Andrew Wakefield, Arpad “poisonous GM potatoes are poisonous” Pusztai*, and Gilbert “100 000 dead in Iraq war” Burnham go hunting together for rabbits. After only a few minutes walking, all three of them simultaneously catch sight of the same bunny in the distance.

Wakefield shoots a tranquilizer dart from his rifle, but it disappears into a bush one yard to the left of the target. Despite this, he brags to his companions, “It’s only a matter of time before the rabbit succumbs to the effects of that injection!”

Pusztai raises his high-powered spud gun to his eye and a pellet of lectin-loaded potato disappears into a bush one yard to the right of the target. Unfazed, he declares, “The deadly effects of my genetically modified potato will kill the rabbit in seconds.”

Burnham watches the other two send their shots hopelessly wide, one to each side. He squints into the distance where Flopsy is still twitching her nose innocently, and scratches his chin, before putting his rifle down and saying, “Okay, guys, I give up. Statistically speaking you’ve already killed the little bastard.”

[*I do think Pusztai was badly treated by the scientific establishment, but I also read his original work that led to his woes and I think it was lousy science.]