I realise a gym in Brighton is probably not the kind of place where you would expect to find, say, The Playboy Channel showing on the TV screens, but yesterday while I was working out the video to the latest Will Young single was on. It’s a Top Gun pastiche that opens with a great big silhouette of a fighter-plane nose cone and the legend “HOT GUN”. Later the pretty boys get their navy pilot shirts off and start slapping each other. Will’s co-pilot has the kind of ‘tache I haven’t seen on a live human being since the 70s. The whole thing makes the video to YMCA look like an edition of Topless Darts. When it had finished I felt the need to belch loudly and leer at women in leotards. In a development that was as appropriate as it was disappointing Madonna’s video followed shortly afterwards.

(On a bitchy note, if he wants to hang out with that kind of company in future then Will needs to work on his upper body development.)