Despite featuring the towering talent of Morrissey, this year's “alternative rock” Lollapalooza tour in the States has had to be cancelled because of poor ticket sales. You mean the young (ha!) people don't want to hand over their hard-earned to witness the still-fresh and boundary-breaking virtuosi of the Pixies and Sonic Youth? Say it isn't so! Boring, musically-challenged blokes who work in the “creative” industries must be weeping into their microbrews across the USA.
And, reflecting on the UK's own Glastonbury festival in The Times, the often-sensible Stephen Pollard seems to have completely lost it. There's no need to drift off into a “bloody long-haired hippies with their drugs and wailing pop music” tirade to make the case against “Glasto”. Three words are sufficient: Oasis are headlining. The biggest draw at the event is an ugly, charisma-free, inarticulate, immobile, lazy, hamfisted, pub duo whose tired Beatles tribute act would be booed off Stars In Their Eyes.
The emperor of indie rock has been stark bollock naked for years. His mistake was to cross the Atlantic and expose himself to the locals. Now the Americans are pointing at his dangly bits and laughing—those Americans who aren't ignoring him completely and hoping he'll be picked up by the police so he stops embarrassing everyone.