As if to taunt me, a new bookshop has opened between where I live and my local supermarket. It is called “Libra Aries” and it sells volumes of new age bollocks:
“Earth Mysteries, Folklore, Druidry, the Northern Tradition, Wicca, Paganism, Shamanism, Golden Dawn, Buddhism, Taoism, Herbs, Vegetarian Cookery, Psychogeography, Self-Publishing & Small Presses, Green & Left Politics, Psychedelia..”
In a new, occasional PooterGeek feature I will simply link to an Amazon page featuring a book from the shop’s window that has caught my eye. Resisting further comment will be part of my own self-administered anger management programme. My dear readers need not feel so bound. Today’s book is The Cat Herbal: Simple Green Remedies for Your Cat.
[…] hed myself in advance with the same, courtesy of the druid who works behind the counter at Libra Aries. Hit me with your best shot, old timer. You do realise that you cannot renew your tax too […]
If only they could talk – they’d say “fuck off!” The only green remedies cats are interested in are the ones they can deposit on your quilt at 3am, preferably with a few rat parts to act as advanced anti-handling devices.
Sorry, me again… What is the “Northern Tradition”? Mushy peas? Pints of best? Doesn’t sound alternative or new age to me.
The “Northern Tradition” holds that most illnesses can be cured by waving a black pudding correctly over the naked body of a sufferer. That’s how I explain it to the exclusively female followers of my new sect anyway, after I’ve offered to examine their chakras for free.
You will need to have one of your female assistants examine my chakras – but I’ll still give you money.