Do you think couturiers these days carefully measure up the rich and/or famous and then offer them a choice between a garment that, when first worn, will fit perfectly and one that will fall off in a precisely calibrated way in public?
[Thank you to my beautiful assistant, Leasey, for this one.]
Please tell me that article was accompanied by a large, full-colour photograph capturing the moment for posterity and shocked Middle-Englanders everywhere.
Keira… pink… [tick]
The kicker being that she doesn’t actually have tits anyway. She is the ‘sexiest tomboy beanpole on the planet’ after all.