You might have noticed that I never write about my own love life here. This is mainly because I don’t have a love life, but neither do I mention foolishly inattentive members of the opposite sex who have accidentally allowed me into their company in the past. Cryptic and multiply-distorted versions of other people’s affairs […]
Read MorePooterGeek is back—just in time for the Easter holidays. Thanks for your kind words, loser lovers. I am genuinely touched.
Read MoreI’ve got an article and a grant application to write—and something more important to do—so there’ll be nothing new here for the best part of a week. In the meantime here’s a Zen window in Cambridge: [click to enlarge]
Read MoreThis could be the start of a new series: “Strange Windows In Cambridge”. Trust me: I have more photos at least as weird as this one. This city has the best university and the worst football team(s) (per capita income) in the country and the highest density of eccentrics on the whole planet. What other […]
Read MoreI suspect the age distribution of the visitors here is such that somebody reading this must have some tips on getting parents over sixty with potentially life-threatening conditions to look after themselves properly. All suggestions welcome.
Read MoreScientists are almost as susceptible to a certain type of urban myth as the rest of the population. One popular one was that there are 100 000 genes in the human genome. When the first estimates of “the number of genes”—I use quotes because exactly what constitutes a single gene is subtle, complex, and controversial—based on […]
Read MoreI had some superb birthday presents this year. I’d especially like to thank Judith for Keane’s Hopes And Fears, Leasey for Ultraviolet, and the Anonymous Economist for the Pierre Marcolini chocolates. Despite the cliché title, Hopes And Fears is a real delight. It’s indie rock descended from the Radiohead-Coldplay line, but without the guitars. She […]
Read MoreDespite years of renting I have never encountered one of those “NO DOGS, NO BLACKS, NO IRISH” signs that used to pock the British landscape. Everyone who knows me will, however, have heard my Mrs Turpey story. They can skip everything up to the last paragraph. I was working for the university in Oxford in […]
Read MoreIf you have Flash installed in your browser, this is a pleasing diversion. [via The Motley Fool]
Read MoreAs the countdown to redundancy continues I envy this creature more and more. If I could retire now, though, it would be the perfect leaving gift for a quasi-civil servant like me.
Read More“The decor looks like an asylum! Where’s my ‘Blogroll link? I want the pretty finger back! I can tell you how to fix that comment spam!” For the next week or so the only complaints I want to hear from you rabble are if your legitimate comments are being bounced, otherwise please stop griping about […]
Read MoreLook, peeps, this is temporary. I’ve upgraded out of necessity, not for aesthetic reasons. As I tried to explain a couple of days ago, you’ll get your favourite features back once I have some time to spend on this site—and I’ve figured out how the new WordPress themes architecture works. Until then, please stop whining. […]
Read MoreThe design looks pretty strange to me too. I’m working on it. I’d really had enough of comment spam linking to “granny she-male cock” and the like appearing in my moderation system while I put off upgrading to WordPress 1.5. Now I’ve finally, er, crossed over there’ll be lots of other weird stuff going on […]
Read MoreLast weekend, as I regarded the wreckage from my most recent computer system balls-up (again), I decided that I should at least squeeze some good from the bad and upgrade PooterGeek’s software to the latest version of WordPress. I stayed up late on Sunday night carefully moving my modifications from 1.1 to 1.2, and also […]
Read MoreI bought a copy of Kate Fox’s Watching The English: The Hidden Rules of English Behaviour a few weeks back. I’ve not really had time to read it of course. So far I’ve managed three chapters: “The Weather” (which, appropriately, opens the book), “Linguistic Class Codes”, and “Rules of Sex”. It’s pretty accurate so far—so […]
Read MoreI tune to Radio 2 in the bathroom, having run through the local stations (“all Bedingfield—all the time”), Virgin (“all REM—all the time”), and Radio 1 (“old people pretending to be young, playing music to young people pretending to be old”). Instead of the usual rambling from Terry Wogan, Johnnie Walker is at the mic […]
Read MoreIf it’s any consolation to you, my last remaining reader, as you vainly reload this page expecting new material, I have at least been getting out a bit more over the last few days, even as far as Wales. There, Auriol and Peter treated me to a superb meal, a browse through a couple of […]
Read MoreI am quiet because I am busy fixing a computer. Sorry everyone. I did take a brief break on Friday evening. During that interval I watched two young women hit each other very hard in front of a baying mob—not on screen; in the flesh. Naturally I’ll ‘Blog that. In the meantime, please feel free […]
Read MoreWoke up this morning. Had no emails. I’m not that unpopular. My server just failed. If you tried to email me between midnight GMT and now then your message has disappeared into the ether. Sorry! Please resend it.
Read MoreAt lunch yesterday afternoon we were discussing infinite swimming pools. This led to a debate on how one might construct an infinite waterfall. I said I was going to make an infinite dance record and call it “DJ Counsell versus MC Escher”. The ensuing silence was so complete that the vapour rising up from my […]
Read MoreLeasey: Hi, Damian. Who are your new friends? PG: The naked one with the beach ball painted grey and labelled “rock” is Sissy; the one in the cape and eye-mask is Benjy. Benjy: You LIE. I am ANON, crusader for TRUTH and JUSTICE. PG: Nice cape, Benjy. Leasey: Are these weirdos coming to the cinema […]
Read MoreWoohoo! I finally won an Ebay camera auction and got a mint condition Dynax 5 for sixty quid from the efficient and polite hitchin2001. This is a bargain price for a gem of a camera. Watch out family, friends, and random strangers: I have my third eye back.
Read MoreAnd now it’s time for Thought For The Day. Over in our Manchester studio we welcome the Reverend Nimmo Platitude of St Gavin’s Church Of The Lost Apostle, Bamber Bridge: “Thank you, James. “This morning I toasted a bagel for my breakfast and, as I lifted one half of the deliciously warm, crispy-soft bun off […]
Read MoreAnthony and Jackie are both ‘Blogging about pain: Jackie about the pain women experience when giving birth and Anthony about the pain men ignore when they have long nails stuck in their heads. “The nail was embedded 4cm into his brain—barely missing his right eye. Six days after his 6 January work accident, Mr Lawler […]
Read MoreMy not-very-exciting anecdote about Germaine Greer is completely true. While I was working there, I started and was Secretary of the Institute of Cancer Research (ICR) Reading Group. It was embarrassingly successful—not because of me, but because the words “Institute of Cancer Research” have magical powers. Upon hearing them, black cab drivers will not only […]
Read MoreAmazon’s UK book best-seller list brings you the five most effective chat-up lines in the country: The Personal Trainer: “I Can Make You Thin.” The European Porn Star: “I haff come to turn you on, and I haff a vehr big drill.” The Latin Lover: “Bonjour, mademoiselle.“ The Cheeky “Cockney” Lad: “Awight, darlin’?“ The Prince: […]
Read MoreGood morning, Mr McKafka. Mr Counsell, we meet again. Not very often, what with your window only opening for business minutes at a time on days of the week with a “K” in their names. Your ready wit never fails to bring a smile to my routine. What quotidian but essential goal can I divert […]
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