I wish my CV was as interesting as Captain Kirk’s. Sure, his starts with the usual stuff:

2264 — Promoted to captain, in command of U.S.S. Enterprise for five-year mission

, but then it progresses to entries like this:

2286 — Charged, convicted and reduced permanently to captain’s rank by the Federation Council for theft of Enterprise a year earlier, after saving Earth from alien onslaught by securing two extinct whales via time-traveling; given command of U.S.S. Enterprise NCC-1701-A