ABC News brings us the wit and wisdom of Dick Cheney:

“It’s not only wildfires that shift with the wind,” Cheney told supporters Friday.

“As westerners, the president and I understand the challenges that we face here in Nevada, especially when it comes to protecting residents from wildfires,” Cheney said here during his first post-convention campaign swing.

But Cheney said Kerry has a different view. “He says he’s in touch with the West,” the Republican said with a smile before delivering the punch line. “He must mean western Massachusetts.”

And, whilst you’re at ABC News, twist yourself into a strange shape trying to find a position you could defend down the pub on the bizarre, but lucrative careers of the Giraffe Women of Thailand.