Backword Dave links to Boris Johnson’s ‘Blog which, like so much else about him, I’m not sure isn’t a pisstake. The real issue is of course his coif.

It is not so much that it is silly (though the arrangement of the strands is at odds with reality): it is rather that all the wigmaker’s arts have been discarded in a cunning double-bluff designed to communicate to the public a vast untruth.

The British people believe, as do others, “No one would have hair like this by choice!” Millions assume therefore that Johnson’s Hitler-as-a-blond-gonk barnet is natural. I know a fellow baldie when I see one, however.

The charge against Johnson’s hair is that it wilfully misrepresents the state of his scalp to the Commons and to the country. Impeach it now!