The BBC has a round-up of “experts'” views on “Iran’s nuclear crisis”. Helpfully, after the introduction to the piece, each comment is abstracted to a single line. One of the wise men questioned by Auntie—Sanam Vakil, of the Council on Foreign Relations, Washington—offers this new insight into the affair:
“The Iranians need some really big carrots”
And I thought it was only on TV that the presence of nuclear power stations gave rise to giant mutant vegetables.
The ongoing argument is why Iran needs nuclear power when it is already sitting on top of a big and relatively cheap source of fuel for power generation. Iran states that nuclear power allows them to sell oil instead of using it for domestic production, thereby maximizing profits.
Carrots are known to aid night vision, therefore improving the eyesight of the population in general, so through giant carrot distribution they can save more power by not having to use lights, again maximising the use of oil for foreign trade.
The super-carrot can also be used to address one of the experts, Professor Nasser Hadian at the department of political science at the University of Tehran, by saying “What’s Up Doc ?”
Last thing we need – Iranians lobbing gigantic carrots at Israel.