Ten non-sexual things a woman (that is: various individual women) has done in the past that have reduced me to Pepe Le Pew:

  1. laughed at my hair,
  2. dressed like a librarian,
  3. correctly fisked my inept critique of a famous theologian,
  4. told her pupils about me,
  5. pretended not to know how to use chopsticks so that I would teach her,
  6. returned my calls,
  7. discreetly touched the back of my shoulder on stage until I remembered where I was in my speech,
  8. helped save another woman’s life,
  9. insisted that we test my account of the Monty Hall Problem empirically, and
  10. turned up.