On the subject of christenings, someone at the Motley Fool has noticed that the name of Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie’s new child, “Shiloh Pitt”, is a world-class spoonerism waiting to happen.
Read More07Jun06 — 3
Celebrities
05Jun06 — 2
Uncanny Resemblance
Last week I went out to the cinema to see a film in Brighton for only the second time since I moved here in October*. After his rehearsal with the Mike Rosenberg Band, long-time Wolverine comic reader Richard drove me along (entirely willingly) to see the third in the trilogy of X-Men movies: X-Men: The […]
Read More02Jun06 — 3
The Curse Of Poot
Remember the Anastacians? Sony Music’s Anastacia forum has been shut down. PooterGeek lives on. Don’t mess with the Geek.
Read More31May06 — 9
Geek Aesthetics
“Hot Wheels” Helena acquired her nickname because, despite being an Advanced Driver who can cadence-brake, control-gear, and turn into skids with the best of them, she used to get about in an ancient Mini Metro Rover 100—and get me about in it when she was my Genome Campus car-sharing partner. She’s ruined the (weak) joke now by […]
Read More18May06 — 0
Monsieur Henry’s Holiday
An outer London suburb. THIERRY HENRY is behind the wheel of a tricked-out hatchback on his way back from his last training session. Early bebop is playing on the stereo. Despite his obvious tristesse, he is tapping a complex counter-rhythm on the steering wheel. THIERRY pulls up at traffic lights and glances across at a […]
Read More04May06 — 1
Licensed Killer Fact
Given that there are a number of famous urban myths about UK TV teen quiz host Bob Holness in circulation, it’s surprising to discover that he really did play James Bond in 1956. Here’s the trailer for the upcoming Casino Royale. Eric the Unread has a link to the French version, Royal Casino.
Read More29Apr06 — 3
Keith Richards “Out Of Tree” Shocker!
But how did he get up there in the first place? [Bonus school-of-journalism marks go to the BBC staffer writing the article for referring to the Rolling Stones as “the famous British band”.]
Read More19Apr06 — 0
Boring And Brief, But At Least I’m Not Going On About That Manifesto
This a is funny post about Grumpy Old Men.
Read More05Apr06 — 2
Run, Katie, Run!
“We want to get married. I won’t let this woman get away,” Tom Cruise told the German media Monday. The world famous movie star said he and Katie Holmes, also of Hollywood, were planning to marry this summer. They have been engaged since last June.
Read More03Apr06 — 0
Own Up, Boys
Was this Guardian letter really a parody by the Harry’s Place mob? Please tell me that Chris Martin supporting the Tories was a spoof. Disillusionment with Labour is bad enough, but to lose respect for Coldplay and their music would exacerbate the situation. Michael Pritchard Watford
Read More03Apr06 — 9
Dear BBC…
Excuse me for not noticing this before as I don’t have a TV, but I have to say that this is exactly the kind of perversion of the natural order you can expect when you employ one of those Godless homosexuals to write Dr Who: a Doctor who’s prettier than his assistant. UPDATE: And butch […]
Read More31Mar06 — 5
Oi, Chris Brooke, No!
Chris, you’re a bright bloke, well-read, great company and all that, but this is plain daft. The Silly Bunt’s article was a steaming pile of cack and responding to her adolescent nonsense about “the Enlightenment” (and her many justified critics in blogland) by wibbling on about “Paolo Mattia Doria’s contemporary five-fold distinction” is a bit […]
Read More29Mar06 — 26
One Shot
I know it’s not Friday, but this is too topical and too tempting to resist. You are an air marshal. You have been called to deal with a disruptive passenger on a plane full of British slebs. As you walk down the aisle to sort out the trouble, this is the view that greets you. […]
Read More29Mar06 — 8
Truly The Devil Has The Best Tunes
Cher can sing, but it’s commonly thought that the warbly electronic effect applied to her voice on her multi-platinum hit Believe was achieved with an infamous piece of pitch-correction software called Auto-Tune. Recording nerds debate whether it was that program or a less interesting vocoder-type gadget (Digitech Talker) that really did the business, but Auto-Tune […]
Read More21Mar06 — 4
…Or The Turkey Gets It
Further to the South Park / Scientology story, Richard points out that another celebrity cultist prominent believer, Tom Cruise, might have pushed Paramount to pull the “offending” episode by threatening not to co-operate in the promotion of his latest movie. There’s a chilling ultimatum: “If you broadcast that South Park episode then it’s curtains for […]
Read More06Mar06 — 3
PooterGeek’s In-Depth Oscar Night Analysis
On the one hand, thousands of religious loons want you dead; on the other hand is Padma Lakshmi: Salman “you’d look smug too” Rushdie and Padma Lakshmi Meanwhile, WTF?: Helena “I am hoping the giant spider on my head will distract you from my dress” Bonham Carter [stolen from MSN]
Read More06Mar06 — 1
Countrified
For girls (or boys) reading this who used to have a crush on John Corbett, the actor who played DJ Chris Stevens in the TV series Northern Exposure, an uncharacteristically frivolous Gloria Salt has some bad news. For the (other) boys, all I can say is that there’s a special kind of schadenfreude that comes […]
Read More05Mar06 — 4
Ebonexia
I’m glad I don’t have TV and have to witness the emergence of a strange new media species: the unhealthily thin black woman who isn’t the victim of a poor harvest. Beyoncé watches in horror as Cece Sammy and Thandie Newton walk past her on their way to their tantric nutritionist [via Hak]
Read More03Mar06 — 2
Fatuous Bint
Regular readers here know that I had little time for the argument that “we” had to invade Iraq because Saddam Hussein had a strategic arsenal trained on Hoxton hidden under his various country homes. It’s been said that I’ve been quite rude about people who signed up too confidently for certain types of WMD-related bollocks, […]
Read More02Mar06 — 1
The Great Silence
For some reason I am reminded by this trailer for the new comedy western Bandidas of the promotional material associated with the Razzie-award-winning Catwoman, material that substituted quotes from press reviews with stills of Halle Berry in a skintight leather catsuit. Bandidas looks rubbish, but the promo takes care to show us that the film […]
Read More19Feb06 — 4
This Weekend’s Train Conversations
On the way to Hot Wheels‘ most excellent party yesterday I met an Englishwoman with a bass who plays in a New Cross bluegrass band. She was wearing an “I’m Up For A Chat On The Tube” badge that turned out to be a product of a conceptual art project to bring random people together. […]
Read More17Feb06 — 9
Mixing It Up
You won’t be surprised to read that I thoroughly approve of miscegenation. One day the whole world will be beige. There will be no war, all corner shops will sell five-spice, and no one will be able to make a buddy movie featuring a funny black sidekick. It always made me smile that the genome […]
Read More15Feb06 — 1
Laughter Lines
“Women chose funny men as relationship partners despite often rating them as less honest and intelligent,” the researchers said in the study published in the journal Evolution and Human Behaviour. In other news: Actor Tom Cruise has branded a story suggesting he is to split from pregnant fiancee Katie Holmes “100% false”. The denial came […]
Read More14Feb06 — 2
Bucks On A Till
A few months back I emailed some friends (one of them a Samuel L Jackson fan with a subscription to Empire) a link to this ‘Blog post about an upcoming movie that practically defines “high concept“: Snakes On A Plane, a film that Samuel L Jackson will appear in because of, not despite, its title. Since then, Snakes On A Plane has become a full-on […]
Read More13Feb06 — 17
A Question For Owners Of Television Sets
Every time I see a photograph of Abu Hamza that includes his torso, it looks like he’s got an iPod Mini hanging round his neck. What is it?
Read More10Feb06 — 2
Is It Just Me Or?…
Jason Donovan, has-been popstar Tony Blair, wannabe popstar
Read More07Feb06 — 0
Thank Heaven For Little Boys
From 70s pop stars to Lib Dem MPs to celebrity feminists, the modern public figure seems to be vulnerable to private temptation by the figure of the young man. Everyone knew Germaine Greer’s battiness had set in properly when she wrote that book about beautiful boys, though the female circumcision thing had already given the […]
Read More06Feb06 — 0
What Else Is There To Do In North Carolina?
Thanks to Tim’s Britblog Roundup I discovered Ivan The Terrible of Dies Irae today. He’s not very correct, but he is very funny. On Fabien Cousteau, son of Jacques: Jacques Cousteau’s grandson, Fabien, is following in his illustrious forebear’s flippers by building a shark-shaped submarine. By means of this ingenious device he will get closer […]
Read More04Feb06 — 2
Tandem For Sale
As announced prematurely back here by Jackie, here’s news of this month’s celebrity break-up. (But, according to the cover of one of the sleb mags in the newsagent’s George Clooney and Teri Hatcher may be involved in merger talks—denial here.)
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