PooterGeek

Geek At Work

And now, like a page from Where’s Wally / Where’s Waldo?, see if you can spot the wedding photographer in this [large!] image. He’s cunningly camouflaged by being the same colour as the furniture. (The camera to my left has a 50mm f/1.4 lens on it and the one in my hands a 100mm f/2.8. […]

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Ooh, That’s A New One

Last year, Newsbiscuit ran a spoof “NEWSPAPERS RUN OUT OF ‘LORD LEVY IS JEWISH’ EUPHEMISMS” story [requires free registration] I was reminded of it when I read this from the latest statement by “the neo-Nazi North German Action Office”, as reported in the Wall Street Journal: Inasmuch as it is a determined opponent of the […]

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Scent Of A Geek

Thanks to this blog, I know it’s been two years since I last acquired a new bottle of cologne/aftershave. Once again, I’m unable to replace the one I’ve finished because, during my months of sparing use, the fragrance my sister bought me back then (itself the nearest approximation to its discontinued predecessor) has been discontinued. […]

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USA Gets Black President; BBC Notices Al-Qaeda Racist

Al-Qaeda in Iraq have reacted to the US presidential election by issuing a statement on Friday directed at President-elect Barack Obama and his incoming administration. … [H]ardliners have greeted Barack Obama’s election victory with a stream of racist and other insults. Because, previously, when Al-Qaeda in Iraq referred to Kurdish-speaking bomb victims as “Kuffir to […]

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Paddy’s Wager

PADDY POWER OFFERS ODDS OF 4-1 THAT GOD EXISTS A bookmaker has slashed its odds on proof being found of God’s existence to just 4-1. Since opening its book just two months ago, punters hoping to have their faith rewarded have placed £5,000 with Paddy Power. It began taking bets on the question that has […]

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Those Beige Headlines In Full

TIGER WOODS WINS 2008 US OPEN DESPITE KNEE INJURY CAUSED BY ILLEGAL KARATE ATTACK FROM EVIL MAFIA GOLFER ROCCO MEDIATE. OBTAINS CRUCIAL PAR SCORE ON SUDDEN-DEATH HOLE USING “CRANE KICK” BEFORE COLLAPSING ON THE FINAL GREEN IN AGONY, MUTTERING “I DID IT FOR YOU, ELIN!” LEWIS HAMILTON CLINCHES WORLD F1 DRIVERS’ CHAMPIONSHIP IN HIS MCLAREN, […]

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I Warned Them, But Did They Listen To Me?…

Perhaps you remember my posting about my little sister’s small claims case against Sky. I wasn’t surprised to receive an email from her on Friday informing me that, after months of time-wasting and attempts at legal intimidation by them—don’t get lawyerly with woman who teaches law—she has finally and comprehensively whupped their sorry asses. My […]

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The Ultimate “Comment Is Free” Comment?

I don’t read or link to “Comment Is Free”, The Guardian‘s cesspit of a group blog. Sadie saves you, me, and everybody from ever having to do so again by republishing a comment from the site that captures the spirit of the place. Under an article about rape, a reader writes: “rape is never a […]

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Top Brand

Further to my last post about this, Russell Brand makes a proper apology to camera here. I can think of several politicians (amongst others) who could learn from it. He doesn’t mess about with words like “inappropriate”, which these days is used to describe everything from ironically referencing a passage in the Koran to trying […]

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Aural Sachs

Andrew Sachs has just been on BBC Radio 4, walking around London Zoo with Tim Samuels and reminiscing about how he used to sneak in there during World War II. Sachs was born to a Jewish family in Berlin in 1930. He and they fled Germany in 1938. He witnessed Kristallnacht—“Goodness, those Stormtroopers are going to get into trouble […]

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Future News For November

TRANSYLVANIAN NOBLEMAN FORCED TO ADMIT TO BEING BULLINGDON CLUB MEMBER MISSING FROM INFAMOUS PHOTOGRAPH: “I HAVE A STRICT ‘NO PICTURES’ RULE—AND DO NOT WISH TO BE ASSOCIATED WITH THE BULLINGDON CLUB’S TREATMENT OF WOMEN,” CLAIMS ANONYMOUS COUNT, 577. AFRICA STAGES “HERRING AID” TO HELP NORTHERN EUROPEAN COUNTRIES COPE WITH CREDIT CRUNCH. BJÖRK TO APPEAR AT […]

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11.05 Miles

I typed the postcode of the house in which I grew up into the box here and it turns out that my childhood decision to support Aston Villa cannot be challenged under the manly rules of manliness.

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Double Exposure With Cream

Remember that very “English” black-and-white print I made of a café in Hove? This supersaturated colour medium-format slide film shot of another corner café, taken in Argentina, is a nice counterpoint to it; even the angles of the shadows are similar. As the photographer says, the stock it was taken with came out of the […]

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Best Of Three Five

John. [originally uploaded by Ryan Brenizer] Excellent shots of the candidates for the US Presidency taken at the Alfred E Smith dinner by a wedding photographer are here on flickr. I wish there were more to look at. (And I wish the photographer hadn’t added that crappy “exposed film” border. It’s digital. Get over it. Don’t tart […]

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A Search Engine For Labels For Mental Objects

When you can’t look up something in a dictionary because you don’t know what you’re looking for, even the wordy vastness of the Web is of limited use. This happens to me often (and that’s one of the reasons why I am not a linguistic determinist). Tip Of My Tongue might help though. [via Lifehacker]

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A Client I Won’t Miss

[BY TELEPHONE] CLIENT-I-WON’T-MISS: [giggling] …and I saw the pictures of that gay wedding on your Website. POOTERGEEK: I shoot Gays, Catholics, Protestants, Humanists, Blacks, Whites, Jews… CLIENT-I-WON’T-MISS: Well, I suppose you have to be prepared to work for anyone when you’re starting out.

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Too Horrible To Contemplate?

Imagine several million small children across the planet waking up on Christmas Day to discover that six of Santa Claus’s reindeer had had pixie dust blowouts at 30 000 feet over the North Atlantic, leading to a catastrophic loss of power and Santa’s sleigh plunging into the freezing ocean, killing all on board and scattering the […]

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Bwanngg!

The Economist plays air plastic guitar: AS THE music industry searches for a new model in the age of digital distribution and internet piracy, it is getting a helping hand from an unexpected quarter: video games such as “Guitar Hero” and “Rock Band”, which let people play along to songs on simplified imitation instruments. “These […]

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Credit Crunch Leads To Balance-Of-Satire Surplus

Here are two I enjoyed: Hopi Sen’s “What would Bertie Wooster do?” and The Daily Mash’s “Government takes 60% stake in Al-Qaeda”: The prime minister said : “We must ensure that, as an institution, it continues to provide a useful, ongoing threat without actually blowing things up.” The Daily Mash is a free online site. […]

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How I Became A Blogger

My getting into this game had nothing to do with some kind of 9/11 epiphany. No, it was the insanity of the property bubble that started me writing spoofs and screeds on the Web, originally at the excellent, skeptical, principled, and free Motley Fool UK site. I retired from posting on its “Property: Markets and […]

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Palin Derangement Syndrome—PalinDrome?

You could argue that Mick Hartley won this game when he collected Reports confirmed my suspicions: Palin, not McCain, is the FrankenBarbie of the Rove-Cheney cabal. from The Huffington Post, but I think quoting Naomi Wolf is cheating. Here’s a good one from yesterday’s International Herald Tribune. Roger Cohen writes: From an inspirational notion, however […]

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How iRoll

Some time back, I raved about the freedom my fat, ugly iRiver gives me compared to an iPod. Now you can make your iRiver free-er or liberate your Apple MP3 player with the marvellous new version 3.0 of Rockbox, the open source firmware replacement. It works with lots of other models of portable music jukeboxes […]

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Bloke-tastic!

And now a post combining football and science: Imagine a robotic David Beckham six times smaller than an amoeba playing with a ‘soccer ball’ no wider than a human hair … with all of the action happening on a field the size of single grain of rice. Yes, it’s “Nanosoccer“: [S]occer nanobots, operated by human […]

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“That they may see your good works”

I like that one of the authors of this US paper describing gene therapy to restore sight in sufferers from a rare form of blindness, itself a refinement of a treatment first given in the UK, is called “Elizabeth Windsor”: “One of the patients said that the dim red light from his alarm clock had […]

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If Only They Could Both Lose

I have been known to have fun at the expense of Chelsea and Manchester United on this site, but following their meeting yesterday, it’s time for me to invite my reader to extend some sympathy to the latter at least. Watchers of Premiership football who value the contribution to the league of Manchester United’s modest […]

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Timing

This afternoon, I walked through my door and picked up this week’s local free newspaper, The Brighton and Hove Leader. Amongst the insert spam included today was a glossy advert for Forbes TV rentals, inviting me to hire a flatscreen TV in time for the Beijing Olympics 2008 and a brochure inviting me to come […]

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