Tim Worstall [thank you, Tim!] recommended PooterGeek in his article about ‘Blogging today in the Times. This would be wonderful news except for my continuing lack of Internet access at home, the absence of any kind of post on PooterGeek today, and my having allowed my “Best Of” section to become months out of date. […]
Read MoreDo you think couturiers these days carefully measure up the rich and/or famous and then offer them a choice between a garment that, when first worn, will fit perfectly and one that will fall off in a precisely calibrated way in public? [Thank you to my beautiful assistant, Leasey, for this one.]
Read MoreLike Frank Sinatra entering a karaoke contest, my friend and co-conspirator Richard Brincklow recently decided to follow up being paid by people to compose music by going to university part-time to study for a degree in music composition. It turns out this week that the jammy bastard has been awarded a First. I suppose I […]
Read MoreTop Ten acts you might be curious enough to watch as long you didn’t have to hand over any of your money: ELVISH Bringing a new meaning to “The Return Of The King”, Elvish is possibly the leading fantasy role-playing Presley impersonator working today and the undisputed hit of 1998’s Nevada TolkienCon. Bob Dylan’s 60s […]
Read More[Location: Fallujah, I-raq. Dateline: November 2004; well past your bedtime. US Rangers and special forces operatives advance on a complex of residential buildings believed to be crawling with the enemy. Watching one entrance through night vision goggles, Sergeant Steve “The Rock” Jenovich leads a half-dozen of his best men into what they believe will be […]
Read MoreIf you are on their snailmail spam list then the latest Viking office stationery catalogue probably dropped through your letterbox this morning. Further to my mention of microwave ovens, on the cover of the brochure is the following offer: “FREE! Get this Microwave FREE with every 4 or more packs of Large Core Sellotape you […]
Read MoreToday’s Guardian devotes three pages to a tribute to the recently deceased educationalist Ted Wragg, who, like most educationalists, wouldn’t have known a controlled experiment if it was being performed on one of his own children with a bonesaw. A lot of the space is taken up with the “best of” his quotable declarations on […]
Read MoreI realise a gym in Brighton is probably not the kind of place where you would expect to find, say, The Playboy Channel showing on the TV screens, but yesterday while I was working out the video to the latest Will Young single was on. It’s a Top Gun pastiche that opens with a great […]
Read MoreYesterday I treated myself to a lunch of cod and chips from an eat-in/takeaway fish and chip shop in Brighton. I ate in. Having taken my order, the guy serving asked me if I wanted anything else. Nervously I requested mushy peas—a delicacy that only those living north of the Irony Curtain* truly understand. Amazingly, […]
Read MoreLiving in my disconnected bubble as I am at the moment, I managed somehow to become convinced that the England-Argentina “friendly” was today. So I stayed in yesterday evening and continued to sort through three years of photographic, prints, negatives, and scans. Par-tee! Even if I didn’t see it, it’s nice to know that one […]
Read MoreAlso amusing in the Graun are the wonderfully unselfconscious words of Susan Rice, Chief Executive of Lloyds TSB Scotland. She’s so terribly, terribly important that she has to put in a 15-hour working day. “Home for me is Aberdeen, my head office is Edinburgh and I’m in London a couple of days a week because […]
Read MoreOne of the extracts from novelist John Fowles’ diaries in the Guardian today neatly sums up the attitude of a certain kind of educated observer to the War On Terror: Rushdie fuss. Eliz in a paranoiac state, that I might support him. This is a clear moral choice. From what I have heard of him, […]
Read MoreLast night a Master’s student (whom I have never taught) phoned me to vent her justified frustration with one of her lecturers’ chronic incompetence. This keen and bright individual had done everything she could and should about the situation and complained through the correct channels. As usual in these situations she wasn’t the only member […]
Read MoreYesterday, the guy who runs the Internet caff where I have become a regular introduced me to Jay, The Only Black Man In Hove. The proprietor thought that I should meet him because Jay makes his living writing and remixing pop. Coming from Hove though, “Jay” turns out to be short for “Justin St Clair […]
Read MoreI was thinking of ‘Blogging Marcel Berlins’ explanation of why he supports Aston Villa Football Club before Norm tagged me about it. It contains possibly the ultimate middle-class football fan anecdote. 10 years old and fresh off the boat from France in South Africa, the lawyer-to-be chose to support Aston Villa because: “I knew what […]
Read MoreSoon it’ll be time to renew my car insurance. When I investigated, I was disappointed to discover that I don’t qualify for cover from Whitey’s Wheels, the new company that only insures Anglo-Saxon drivers. For some time now, actuaries have recognized that white people make fewer and smaller claims on their car insurance than black […]
Read MoreI’ve put all my bedroom furniture together now, and my bedtime reading over the past few days has been Philip K. Dick’s The Man In The High Castle. [Typically, Penguin publishes the book inside two different tarted-up covers, but with the same nasty old typesetting inside.] As “what if the Axis won the War?” novels […]
Read MoreA man goes to the zoo. When he arrives there is just a dog sat in a cage. It was a Shitzu.
Read MoreI think the riots in France are a protest by disenfranchised Muslim youth against that country’s involvement in the disastrous imperialist adventure in Iraq.
Read MoreI think I may be in lust with the non-blonde two of Marks & Spencer’s new womenswear models: Erin O’Connor and Noemie Lenoir. (You’ve got to wonder, though, about about a woman (Erin) who was dumped by Jamie Theakston, rather than dumping him herself.)
Read MoreYour meagre anecdotes insult Bast, Perfumed Protector, Cat Goddess. The one you call “Little Mo” has paid the ultimate price for your failure to show sufficient respect. Until all households of the Infidel West are part of the Catiphate our martyrdom operations will continue. Until the sacred lands of the desert again flow with milk […]
Read MoreRelatively new ‘Blogger Gloria Salt of Apropos of Nothing emailed me the other day to ask me what was with all the photos of cats on ‘Blogs. I explained that catblogging was something of a tradition of the medium, to the extent that even male Oxford academic Chris Brooke had a “Thursday Kitten Blogging” feature. […]
Read MoreNo time to ‘Blog properly today. [Insert your own joke about the current quality of PooterGeek here.] So I’ll just make one observation about the Guardian, because it’s a quick and easy way of filling space. There’s a piece (in G2?) today about how the Women’s Institute is shedding its mumsy, Home Counties, jam-making image […]
Read MoreIn a cunning flanking move, The Guardian responds to my post yesterday by publishing a letter from my Old Labour dad today. How can I sustain my free-thinking, post-Thatcherite, Left libertarian, public-private agnostic, open source-advocating online persona when my rellies are wandering around wearing metaphorical “Save Clause Four” T-shirts?: Maybe I’m naive, but what kind […]
Read MoreI have been feeling so cut off without broadband that I’ve been paying to read The Guardian recently. By way of atonement I have once-again applied PooterGeek’s patented Future News technology to bring you the best of next week’s editions of that proud organ—so you don’t need to buy it. The Silencing Of The Damned […]
Read MoreAs I’ve mentioned before, I won’t have Net access from home until the end of November and neither will I have a landline. I am now down to 20 minutes of talk time with Orange and they won’t let me upgrade (even temporarily) until the 19th. According to the advertised tariff, every minute I’m on […]
Read MoreHe’s educated, rich, famous, good looking, second in line to the throne of the fourth largest economy on the planet, and a large proportion of the female population under the age of forty would like to sleep with him. So naturally you buy him an Aston Villa season ticket. That’ll teach him the meaning of […]
Read MoreFurther to the ginge-rock question, my Oirish friend Cathal emailed to point us at this Red Pride site, where there are plenty of copper-topped celebs.
Read MoreHaving recently acquired a used Ford Anglia via eBay I no longer need the following longstanding PooterGeek subject category.
Read MoreThis photo from my leaving do in Cambridge demonstrates the stunning improvement in my luck with the ladeez as a result of carefully spreading rumours about the size of my redundancy package: Jo, inventor of “Shouty Woman”, is on the left; Hot Wheels Helena is on the right. [click to enlarge]
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