Never mind the Oscars; what about those British and American atrocities?
Read More26Jan05 — 2
PooterGeek
26Jan05 — 5
A Day In The Life
Leasey: Hi, Damian. Who are your new friends? PG: The naked one with the beach ball painted grey and labelled “rock” is Sissy; the one in the cape and eye-mask is Benjy. Benjy: You LIE. I am ANON, crusader for TRUTH and JUSTICE. PG: Nice cape, Benjy. Leasey: Are these weirdos coming to the cinema […]
Read More26Jan05 — 0
Snapping Again
Woohoo! I finally won an Ebay camera auction and got a mint condition Dynax 5 for sixty quid from the efficient and polite hitchin2001. This is a bargain price for a gem of a camera. Watch out family, friends, and random strangers: I have my third eye back.
Read More24Jan05 — 8
Writer’s Block
I might have to consult Will of A General Theory Of Rubbish. I’ve been trying to complete a post about Michael Howard, but I’ve run out of profanities.
Read More24Jan05 — 52
If He Existed He’d Be Laughing
“THREE Muslim pilgrims were killed and 500 others suffered light injuries as they jostled to perform the ‘stoning of the devil’ ritual near Mecca, Saudi newspapers reported today. The crush was triggered by the arrival of ‘a large number of African pilgrims carrying their personal belongings’ at the site of the stoning in Mina called […]
Read More21Jan05 — 12
Brief Break
It’s going to be quiet here over the next couple of days, but everyone else I link to in that column on the right seems to be ‘Blogging like crazy lately so you should be able to find entertainment via my ‘Blogroll while I sort out a couple of things in meatspace.
Read More20Jan05 — 3
Watch Out For Those Feeble-Minded Tavern Girls
Following on from my James D. Watson link, yesterday a colleague of mine lobbed me a review copy of DNA and the Criminal Justice System by David Lazer. Click the smaller image below to see an interesting diagram it reproduces from a textbook in use in the early half of the twentieth century (unfortunately it’s […]
Read More19Jan05 — 12
“It’s Full Of Rocks…”
How we mocked Dr Who for its low budget conviction that most of the planets and moons in the Universe (firm enough for humanoids to be chased across by stuntmen in monster suits) resembled abandoned gravel pits. Who’s laughing now?
Read More18Jan05 — 7
Operation Overload
Kennedy says Iraq is ‘Bush’s Vietnam’. But, if Bush=Hitler, surely it’s his Eastern Front? That can’t be, of course, because Kabul was supposed to be America’s Stalingrad—as was, er, Baghdad. At least we can be sure that Abu Ghraib is Iraq’s My Lai—as long as it’s not true that September 11 2001 was the new […]
Read More18Jan05 — 1
Theodicy
And now it’s time for Thought For The Day. Over in our Manchester studio we welcome the Reverend Nimmo Platitude of St Gavin’s Church Of The Lost Apostle, Bamber Bridge: “Thank you, James. “This morning I toasted a bagel for my breakfast and, as I lifted one half of the deliciously warm, crispy-soft bun off […]
Read More17Jan05 — 6
Second Up Against The Wall
Before he joined the Guardian looney tune crowd Jonathan Freedland wrote a republican manifesto called “Bringing Home The Revolution“. Early on in it, I think, there is a nice little paragraph about how the American dream is to arrive with nothing, work hard, and then watch your son strive and study until one day he […]
Read More17Jan05 — 0
Ouch
Anthony and Jackie are both ‘Blogging about pain: Jackie about the pain women experience when giving birth and Anthony about the pain men ignore when they have long nails stuck in their heads. “The nail was embedded 4cm into his brain—barely missing his right eye. Six days after his 6 January work accident, Mr Lawler […]
Read More17Jan05 — 0
The Final Indignity
When I was ten he was dead scary. Now Darth Vader’s breathing mask gazes up at me from my carpet slippers. (I should point out that they were in a Next sale and therefore cheaper than the non-franchise variety. When I’m hangin’ in my crib I dress like a love god, but I do so […]
Read More16Jan05 — 1
Radio Porn
Kirsty Young has been standing in for wrinkly Yorkshireman Michael Parkinson on his Radio 2 show lately. Her voice is pure sex. When she read out the title of a book in her orgulous Scottish husk: “Why The Whales Came“, I listened and could picture both voiceless labio-velar fricatives blossom perfectly. The whales were probably […]
Read More15Jan05 — 1
Where Was Inspector Morse?
Good socialists here, here, and here ‘Blog the demise of Rosa Luxemburg, but it is important that the loss of another Rosa Luxemburg is not overlooked—by Chris especially, and by others of the Left who, unlike Dr Brooke, are now almost certainly working as management consultants, investment bankers, or barristers: “Dons at an Oxford University […]
Read More15Jan05 — 0
By Popular Request
Explanations of yesterday’s jokes are here and here. Deary me, the quality of my audience 😉 .
Read More14Jan05 — 1
Glacial Acetic
I’m ashamed to say that, after I read it at the Motley Fool, it took me fourteen hours to get this joke: “My daughter asked me for some Nikes for her birthday. I said: ‘You’re nine—you can make them yourself.’” I’m proud to say that this one from Radio Two made me laugh instantly: “Who […]
Read More14Jan05 — 5
Back To The Drawing Board
I had started on this spoof combining the Mark Thatcher and Harry Windsor stories. You know the sort of thing: “So, Mr Thatcher, this was an ironic coup? Well, yah, we’d a bit to drink and a couple of chums had dressed up in fatigues for a party and one of the fellas—an old friend […]
Read More14Jan05 — 0
One Whiner, One Woman
As Tim Worstall notes, Maureen Dowd is whining again. This time, apparently, men want to be mothered before they will marry. She writes: “I’d been noticing a trend along these lines, as famous and powerful men took up with the young women whose job it was to tend to them and care for them in […]
Read More13Jan05 — 3
Last Minute Deals In Our Closing Down Sale
The Medical Research Council (MRC) currently has links to six press releases on the front page of its Website. One of them is about work by the National Institute for Medical Research (NIMR) on HIV and another is about work on the pufferfish genome by a group at the Human Genome Mapping Project Resource Centre—now […]
Read More12Jan05 — 3
Godwinning
Claire sent me this one. I’m not going to tell you what to think. If you find something familar about the text, you do; if you don’t, you don’t. Either way, it’s chilling history.
Read More12Jan05 — 1
Aspiring To Greatness
My dad sent me one from The Guardian. It outlines what people on this side of the Pond would consider a radical plan for “saving” Oxford University, a plan that most people familiar with US higher education would just shrug their shoulders at. Here, in cutting-edge Cambridge, a horse has just trotted past my window.
Read More11Jan05 — 2
iStupid
Today the undeniably charismatic CEO of Apple Computer Inc., Steve Jobs, gave his keynote address to the Macworld Conference and Expo in San Francisco. As often he announced some new shiny things for people with roll-neck sweaters (and Backword Dave) to buy, including the iPod Shuffle—an iPod for runners. It has no moving parts, no […]
Read More11Jan05 — 2
She’s A Celebrity—Keep Her In There!
My not-very-exciting anecdote about Germaine Greer is completely true. While I was working there, I started and was Secretary of the Institute of Cancer Research (ICR) Reading Group. It was embarrassingly successful—not because of me, but because the words “Institute of Cancer Research” have magical powers. Upon hearing them, black cab drivers will not only […]
Read More10Jan05 — 4
Duck
Shockingly, according to the BBC, fears of exposure to over 3 000 “fuck”s didn’t seem to reduce people’s willingness to watch the big broadcast: “More than 1.7 million viewers watched Jerry Springer – The Opera on BBC Two on Saturday, despite the objections of protesters. At least 45,000 people had contacted the BBC to complain about […]
Read More10Jan05 — 3
Veg Talk
Despite their claims for its health benefits, I remember it always seemed to be the vegetarians at college that who had the weight problems (either under- or over-) and the interesting skin conditions. The latter could have been caused by all the roll-ups they smoked, I suppose; but one undergraduate female dallied with veganism for […]
Read More09Jan05 — 6
Don’t Knock Cheap Cameras
As you probably know, my not-so-trusty (hundred-and-fifty quid) camera is out of sorts—almost certainly as a result of rough handling by me. So I used the 35mm film compact that I bought for my parents to take pictures of my niece Maisie’s second Christmas. It was maddeningly difficult for a habitual SLR-user like me to […]
Read More09Jan05 — 0
In The Interests Of Balance
A very sharp Right-winger who goes by the alias of “femiokay” (I always picture him as a shrewd ex-pat Nigerian businessman) posts frequently over at The Motley Fool. He made a striking observation on Friday about the way BBC News online reported on the three main party leaders’ New Year messages. Tony Blair gets to […]
Read More09Jan05 — 1
How’s About It, Then?
Amazon’s UK book best-seller list brings you the five most effective chat-up lines in the country: The Personal Trainer: “I Can Make You Thin.” The European Porn Star: “I haff come to turn you on, and I haff a vehr big drill.” The Latin Lover: “Bonjour, mademoiselle.“ The Cheeky “Cockney” Lad: “Awight, darlin’?“ The Prince: […]
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