I bought a bed (well, two futon-sofas) yesterday. I haven’t put it together yet, but even sleeping on the mattress alone was a huge improvement on sleeping on the floor, where I developed a serious neckache and dreamt, amongst other strange things, about driving Santa’s sleigh—pulled by the usual reindeer, plus a fox. While I […]
Read MoreTen products routinely used in ways which expressly contradict their accompanying instructions or break English law: cotton wool buds—“Do not insert into the ear canal…” King-Size Rizla cigarette papers—did you know that the green Rizla papers with the corners cut off are for blind smokers? blank CD-Rs—“Obtain the permission of the copyright holder…” phallic vibrating […]
Read MoreHow can I resist a ‘Blog post that knocks indie rockers and iPods at the same time? Thinking of buying an iPod Nano? If you really love music, there’s a better way to spend your money. Shame about the colour.
Read MoreThe following requires that you are at least partly familiar with the plot of Clint Eastwood’s Million Dollar Baby—more familiar than Amazon is, at least. Every so often the system by which the company’s Website attaches cover images to product descriptions goes horribly, horribly wrong.
Read MoreIt’s Friday, so I’m not looking to revive that old argument about the stationery, but I thought you lot might be amused by my two Playboy-related observations of the week. Firstly I was in an ASDA supermarket the other day and decided to survey their “Back To School” range. Hoping not to be denounced as […]
Read MoreAndy at Rummaging writes the ‘Blog post about Eurovision that I would have written had the bastard not beaten me to it by cunningly publishing it in advance of the grand final.
Read MoreThe menswear floor of the Cambridge Grafton branch of Next: Leasey and I are practising low-stress tag team male/female shopping, a mode of consumption made possible by mobile phone technology. At last an end to blokes idling morosely in Monsoon while the women they are browsing with compare a succession of near identical burgundy velvet […]
Read MoreYeah, nothing much to read here at the moment, I know, but Rummaging is on a roll. Check out “Himmler Action Figure. Gay Interest?” and “The best staff profiles ever“—outstanding weirdness.
Read MoreI meant to ‘Blog this weeks ago. Readers in the UK might be interested to know that there is at least one way of circumventing those 0870 numbers that firms use these days to get us to pay to talk to them. Thanks to Jonathan Nicholson at the Sanger.
Read MoreAndy at Rummaging collects wacky tales of weird sales on eBay. He’s just been added to the ‘Blogroll. I think I might add a half-dozen or so new entries to the ‘roll over the next couple of weeks. Send your bribe pledge to [this ‘Blog’s name] at gmail.com and I’ll see what I can do […]
Read MoreThis could be the start of a new series: “Strange Windows In Cambridge”. Trust me: I have more photos at least as weird as this one. This city has the best university and the worst football team(s) (per capita income) in the country and the highest density of eccentrics on the whole planet. What other […]
Read MoreBy way of shaming His Comatose Stoatness I give you PooterGeek’s very own Dead Socialist Watch.
Read MoreSomebody somewhere (Japan) thinks that dressing up dogs as sheep and even putting them in little pens is a good thing. Can you believe that they’ve sold out of some of these products? There’s probably a Japanese game show where they dress lambs up as dogs and get them to guide the pooches into their […]
Read MoreI had some superb birthday presents this year. I’d especially like to thank Judith for Keane’s Hopes And Fears, Leasey for Ultraviolet, and the Anonymous Economist for the Pierre Marcolini chocolates. Despite the cliché title, Hopes And Fears is a real delight. It’s indie rock descended from the Radiohead-Coldplay line, but without the guitars. She […]
Read MoreDespite years of renting I have never encountered one of those “NO DOGS, NO BLACKS, NO IRISH” signs that used to pock the British landscape. Everyone who knows me will, however, have heard my Mrs Turpey story. They can skip everything up to the last paragraph. I was working for the university in Oxford in […]
Read MoreWhat happens when inflation on goods goes negative and inflation on services stays positive? You get a free computer for signing up with a mobile phone network.
Read MoreAs the countdown to redundancy continues I envy this creature more and more. If I could retire now, though, it would be the perfect leaving gift for a quasi-civil servant like me.
Read MoreHot Wheels Helena now has her own ‘Blog, but I am not allowed to link to it yet, which is why half of the posts this week are courtesy of her. Because Her Boy had (administrative, not financial) problems with his plastic we had to shop for dinner on Wednesday immediately beforehand. As I wandered […]
Read MoreAs if everything else wasn’t enough my Net connection has been down for the past twenty-four hours. I’ll be back and in effect tomorrow, I promise. Read this short story. Watch this movie. Buy this badge.
Read MoreI am quiet because I am busy fixing a computer. Sorry everyone. I did take a brief break on Friday evening. During that interval I watched two young women hit each other very hard in front of a baying mob—not on screen; in the flesh. Naturally I’ll ‘Blog that. In the meantime, please feel free […]
Read MorePerhaps one reason I don’t have a family is that I am the sort of person who would want to push his offspring around in one of these. [via boing boing]
Read MoreWhen I was ten he was dead scary. Now Darth Vader’s breathing mask gazes up at me from my carpet slippers. (I should point out that they were in a Next sale and therefore cheaper than the non-franchise variety. When I’m hangin’ in my crib I dress like a love god, but I do so […]
Read MoreToday the undeniably charismatic CEO of Apple Computer Inc., Steve Jobs, gave his keynote address to the Macworld Conference and Expo in San Francisco. As often he announced some new shiny things for people with roll-neck sweaters (and Backword Dave) to buy, including the iPod Shuffle—an iPod for runners. It has no moving parts, no […]
Read MoreAs you probably know, my not-so-trusty (hundred-and-fifty quid) camera is out of sorts—almost certainly as a result of rough handling by me. So I used the 35mm film compact that I bought for my parents to take pictures of my niece Maisie’s second Christmas. It was maddeningly difficult for a habitual SLR-user like me to […]
Read MoreAmazon’s UK book best-seller list brings you the five most effective chat-up lines in the country: The Personal Trainer: “I Can Make You Thin.” The European Porn Star: “I haff come to turn you on, and I haff a vehr big drill.” The Latin Lover: “Bonjour, mademoiselle.“ The Cheeky “Cockney” Lad: “Awight, darlin’?“ The Prince: […]
Read MoreNorman Geras bought me dinner this evening. I accepted on condition that he let me do the same for him next time we met. More importantly he was excellent company and even more interesting in real life than he is on his ‘Blog—which is saying something. He is also taller. This very effectively took my […]
Read MoreWith this delightful collector’s timepiece you can count the hours down until the writs fly.
Read MoreGood morning, Mr McKafka. Mr Counsell, we meet again. Not very often, what with your window only opening for business minutes at a time on days of the week with a “K” in their names. Your ready wit never fails to bring a smile to my routine. What quotidian but essential goal can I divert […]
Read MoreAs a child I would watch my dad make a fire in the morning, kneeling down in his vest, putting paper from old copies of The Guardian underneath the coal (and then quite likely lighting his first cigarette of the day with the flame—he’s been smokeless now for years). Susurration has stolen a lead all […]
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