Cornershop Man watches every single cricket international he can on his satellite TV under the counter—and, unlike me, he fails the Tebbit test. At the start of the week, I asked him: “Suppose you’re looking forward to whupping England’s backsides?” “Hmm,” he inhaled, “I don’t know. You’ve got some good bowlers with you. You could […]
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27Nov08 — 2
Mini-Me
A lot of people spend their youth experimenting. As my mother often tells people who really don’t want to know, I spent my youth experimenting: with chemicals, electricity, and the flora and fauna of Birmingham’s green belt. Just like my peers who took part in drug parties, random sexual coupling, and street violence—I suppose I […]
Read More09Nov08 — 2
Scent Of A Geek
Thanks to this blog, I know it’s been two years since I last acquired a new bottle of cologne/aftershave. Once again, I’m unable to replace the one I’ve finished because, during my months of sparing use, the fragrance my sister bought me back then (itself the nearest approximation to its discontinued predecessor) has been discontinued. […]
Read More12Sep08 — 2
Timing
This afternoon, I walked through my door and picked up this week’s local free newspaper, The Brighton and Hove Leader. Amongst the insert spam included today was a glossy advert for Forbes TV rentals, inviting me to hire a flatscreen TV in time for the Beijing Olympics 2008 and a brochure inviting me to come […]
Read More11Aug08 — 6
Say What You Like About Joseph Stalin, At Least He Made The Underground Trains Run On Time
It was quiet here last week because I had a lot of things on—to the extent that I had to stop off at the 24-hour Tesco superstore in the small hours of Saturday on the way back from singing at a gig to do my week’s shopping. I’ve read some extreme tales about the goings […]
Read More24Jul08 — 0
Nokia 6300 Review
I had to replace my mobile phone recently, so I deliberately downgraded. After perfunctory Internet research, I got a Nokia 6300. If you are not one of the Young People and you use your phone for business then it is a most excellent tool. If you want to blog or surf the Net from your […]
Read More04Feb08 — 11
My Celebrity Stalkers
On Saturday, I was one of two customers in a tiny local deli until Nick Cave walked in, dressed head-to-toe in black and accompanied by his children in white judo outfits. I toyed with the idea of getting His Caveness to sign my olives, but that would have taken the weirdness one step too far. […]
Read More04Feb08 — 6
Shot Down
Thanks in part to you lot, I have for some time been the top hit on Google for “film photographer“, which doesn’t do my business any harm. Anyone familiar with my style of photography will understand why I am disturbed by the news story on the BBC Website that’s currently in the number three position: […]
Read More23Dec07 — 2
Christmas Shopping
WHSmith, home of the Tragic Life Story, brings us a Great Gift Idea for Christmas: Madeleine: A most heartbreaking and extraordinary disappearance
Read More13Sep07 — 0
Transports Of Detroit
This video not only contains a collection of excellent car-buying advice (which is almost as useful in the UK as in the USA), but a fine lesson in how to use presentation software to support a talk and in how to give a talk that’s no longer than it needs to be.
Read More12Sep07 — 12
Toshiba Tecra A8 Review
As I admitted yesterday, I’ve taken part in Talk Toshiba‘s blogger outreach programme. I thoroughly approve of this sort of thing. Not only does it make bloggers feel even more important than we already think we are, but it allows us to play with shiny things for free. (It’s also a boon to those with […]
Read More17Jul07 — 3
Unseen Square Footage
A couple of years back I planned a new running scenario on PooterGeek: Tora-Bora-nation Street. The idea was simple: Tony Blair and the rest of his family would drop into the local Corrie-style corner shop from time to time and I would depict their developing relationship with the new proprietors—with the Blairs unaware that the […]
Read More05Jul07 — 4
Dave The Rave
I listened to Gordon Brown’s first Prime Minister’s Questions as actual Prime Minister yesterday. If you put the substance of the “debate” aside (as the laws of contemporary British journalism require all commentators to do) then David Cameron made Gordon Brown sound a bit rickety. The good thing for our democracy is that, before most […]
Read More26Jun07 — 1
The Harsh Truth
Hot Wheels Helena is back from Glastonbury with a message for post-modernists, fundamentalists, and plain mentalists everywhere: More info here. [Thanks to Caroline for the pic.]
Read More18Jun07 — 6
Geek Rock
Last week, Steve Wright interviewed Paul McCartney on BBC Radio 2. At one point, Wright asked him about his latest single. The track is exactly what you would expect of Lord Macca of Loch Kodak: completely insubstantial and terminally catchy. It’s called Dance Tonight. It’s about how everybody is going to dance tonight—and have a good time, […]
Read More15May07 — 2
Where The Wind Comes Sweepin’ Down The Plain
Scientific research has confirmed that, finally, everything is on the Internet. This woman sells $40 000-worth of tumbleweed a year online. Does the phrase “organic tumbleweed farm” make you think of tanned hippie chicks and hippie fellas on mountain bikes corralling rolling bushes into enclosures as swirls of dust drift across the prairie around them? It […]
Read More10Apr07 — 2
If This Is The Answer…
They call themselves “Paramount Vehicle Solutions“, perhaps because the vehicles they sell are seen by some as a solution to the problem of having a small penis, but would you hand over seventy thousand pounds to someone who thinks the plural of “Aston Martin” is “Aston Martin’s”?
Read More05Apr07 — 7
Snapshots From My Glamorous Life
Last week, I noticed a registered Brighton & Hove taxi parked outside the Muslim community centre. Prominent on the dashboard was a hardback copy of Richard Dawkins’ The God Delusion. A couple of days later I saw the car (and the book) again. This time the vehicle was being attended to by two of B&H’s […]
Read More20Mar07 — 3
The Low Spark Of High Heel Boy
Last week, as part of my continuing journey into girly, I was photographing ladies’ fashions and domestic interiors for i gigi and the i gigi General Store. I recommend that you pop down to the latter at 37 Western Road in Brighton because it is truly a sight to see. This is a shop that looks like […]
Read More15Mar07 — 2
Slap It On
The best thing about this site selling spray-on hair is the completely honest promotional image in the top-right-hand corner of the front page. In it, Mr SprayOnHair has whipped round quickly to prevent the admiring woman with her hands on his shoulder from stroking the top of his head and coming away with a palm […]
Read More09Mar07 — 2
It’s All In The Hanging
Jogging from the bank yesterday evening to catch Richard Brincklow‘s in-store performance at Passenger‘s launch of their new single [buy it now!*], I stopped to photograph this: Regulars will know that I am not an admirer of Banksy’s work, but circumstances and the shrewd planning of the staff at artrepublic temporarily turned the 2006 effort […]
Read More29Jan07 — 1
A Message From Our Sponsors
The previous post included my first paid link to Amazon. In future, when I recommend a book or CD or DVD here I’ll link to its Amazon page. I always used to do this anyway because it was convenient. It also happens that I am a frequent Amazon customer and that their service has always […]
Read More20Jan07 — 4
Overheard In The Newsagent’s
Remember this place? Yesterday I’m in there and a middle-aged white bloke in a cravat is sounding off at the (Gujarati) proprietor as the nearest consultable expert on the question of contemporary Indian pulchritude. “Everybody says that one on Big Brother is beautiful, but I’ve seen better. She’s very pale skinned. I wonder if she […]
Read More17Jan07 — 4
Grammar Horror
[Brace yourself, dad.] I’m shopping around for a colocation service—crudely, a secure shed with a big pipe to the Net where I can install a server. As you’d expect I’ve been checking out local companies. One I won’t be using is Intramedia. The front page of their Website is dominated by what I suppose I […]
Read More11Jan07 — 6
Christmas Cuteness
My niece spent most of the holiday either (briefly) naked or (for the vast majority of the time) dressed in one of her hideous Disney-licensed “Princess™” costumes. For the family photographer this was deeply, deeply frustrating. Here’s the best I could do under the circumstances. I took these on black-and-white film of course. You’d scratch […]
Read More09Jan07 — 11
Nokia PC Suite Connection Tip
[Warning: This post is slightly geeky.] I have to clean up and transfer all my mobile phone contacts from my old to my new phone before I move to a new provider tomorrow—thereby saving about two-thirds on my mobile bill. For Friends of the Geek (and clients) reading this, my mobile number will remain unchanged, […]
Read More29Dec06 — 12
The Lynx Effect
Once again this year the members of my family, both biological and legal, were generous with their hospitality and presents. My thanks to them all. They are good to me despite having lived with me through that stage in my life when I wore far too much of some nasty aftershaves. Most of my family […]
Read More27Dec06 — 8
Not Gay Trousers
Heaven knows why he chose me, but I have been asked by its proprietor to direct some PooterGeek Google karma in the direction of this “queer shirts’n’gifts” site: LGBTees.com, a shop that proves there’s more to LGBT apparel than rainbows. Apropos of nothing, I invite you to marvel at one of my niece Maisie’s Christmas […]
Read More30Nov06 — 3
Season’s Magreetings
On the way to Intenso to drop off some photos, I passed the windows of an art supplies shop and snapped these items from the display with my cameraphone.
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