Two special Ks from the Beeb’s Pirates Of The Caribbean 2 première gallery: Kelly—a figure lusted after by many men Keira—a figure aspired to by many women I used to work with a bright, attractive, independent woman. She even maintained her own classic car. (She’s the only female I’ve ever met who owned her own […]
Read MoreTrevor Rabin, 80s hair-guitarist-with-pretensions and the man who wrote Owner Of A Lonely Heart (one of the greatest pop singles of all time) while sitting on his toilet, has scored the orchestral music for Snakes On A Plane! Does it get any better than this? The film is so important to me now that I […]
Read MoreI’m not very good at crossword puzzles. My dad, however, was schooled by Jesuits, did classics at university, taught English for decades, and collects useless information. If you wanted to build an elite special forces crossword-solving unit then that is probably how you would train its members. Since he is a connoisseur of the biggest […]
Read MoreAfter you’ve read this blog’s harmless and amusing comparison of real college life with co-ed porn movies, check out the comments, where, for no immediately obvious reason, a visitor launches an irrelevant tirade about, well, you can probably fill in the rest if I reproduce the last couple of sentences: “I hope those Iraqis kick […]
Read MoreWorld domination. It’s not what it used to be. Sharks, lasers, death rays, golf carts driven by chicks in jumpsuits? Get with the program, people! Picture this: a lovable retired university professor in an Australia T-shirt. He walks into a pub, talks to you about cricket, human rights, and before you know it you’ve invaded […]
Read More“One does not simply walk into Mortor…“
Read MoreLast week I went out to the cinema to see a film in Brighton for only the second time since I moved here in October*. After his rehearsal with the Mike Rosenberg Band, long-time Wolverine comic reader Richard drove me along (entirely willingly) to see the third in the trilogy of X-Men movies: X-Men: The […]
Read MoreA blasted heath on the edge of a backlit forest. Low clouds of mist lap around a natural arena. A figure strides over a hillock into view. It is IAN MCKELLEN. He is wearing a very silly helmet and matching cape. He is in possession of a KNIGHTHOOD and an enormous cheque. IAN MCKELLEN: Patrick! […]
Read MoreGiven that there are a number of famous urban myths about UK TV teen quiz host Bob Holness in circulation, it’s surprising to discover that he really did play James Bond in 1956. Here’s the trailer for the upcoming Casino Royale. Eric the Unread has a link to the French version, Royal Casino.
Read MoreThis a is funny post about Grumpy Old Men.
Read MoreWow. A version of My Way I don’t feel the urge to turn off half way through. And check out the other trailer for Happy Feet too.
Read MoreAfter a hard day’s coding [yeah, you thought I’d put that crap behind me too], there’s nothing like settling down in front of your monitor to watch the latest movie trailers online. The one(s) for Basic Instinct in particular is/are gloriously bad. I was going to write a few paragraphs marvelling at David Morrissey’s ability […]
Read MoreThere’s even a forum on the Internet Movie Database where members are trying to come up with a tagline for the film whose title is a tagline: Snakes On A Plane: “They’re not after the peanuts.” Snakes On A Plane: “Scared of heights? Scared of snakes? We put them together.” Snakes On A Plane: “This […]
Read MoreSome freaky blog technology glitch has resulted in a link back to PooterGeek being posted underneath a review of The Road To Guantánamo on a site calling itself “The Movies Blog“. Worse: the text of the link is the heading of a post of mine where I enthused about a trailer for Team America: World […]
Read MoreRich, I know you’re busy with moving house and that young composers’ thing you told me about on the phone yesterday, but, man, we have to enter this competition ASAP. This movie is crying out for our music: Get your copy of the player here
Read MoreAt PooterGeek we love Snakes On A Plane. Thank you to Peter Briffa for drawing my attention to the Snakes On A Plane sequel pitch thread at the Internet Movie Database discussion boards—samples: Jurassic Snake A crazy British entrepeneur brings dinosaurs back to life by extracting genetic material from amber, using snake cells to fill […]
Read MoreFurther to the South Park / Scientology story, Richard points out that another celebrity cultist prominent believer, Tom Cruise, might have pushed Paramount to pull the “offending” episode by threatening not to co-operate in the promotion of his latest movie. There’s a chilling ultimatum: “If you broadcast that South Park episode then it’s curtains for […]
Read MoreOn the one hand, thousands of religious loons want you dead; on the other hand is Padma Lakshmi: Salman “you’d look smug too” Rushdie and Padma Lakshmi Meanwhile, WTF?: Helena “I am hoping the giant spider on my head will distract you from my dress” Bonham Carter [stolen from MSN]
Read MoreFor some reason I am reminded by this trailer for the new comedy western Bandidas of the promotional material associated with the Razzie-award-winning Catwoman, material that substituted quotes from press reviews with stills of Halle Berry in a skintight leather catsuit. Bandidas looks rubbish, but the promo takes care to show us that the film […]
Read MoreA few months back I emailed some friends (one of them a Samuel L Jackson fan with a subscription to Empire) a link to this ‘Blog post about an upcoming movie that practically defines “high concept“: Snakes On A Plane, a film that Samuel L Jackson will appear in because of, not despite, its title. Since then, Snakes On A Plane has become a full-on […]
Read MoreIt used to be a common pattern: first they’d misspell my name “Damien” and then they’d make a joke about 70s horror classic The Omen*. This has been fading lately, except with those of a certain age—step forward, Hak. Unfortunately, the self-eating content monster has finally got round to remaking the 1976 original. Here we […]
Read MoreAs announced prematurely back here by Jackie, here’s news of this month’s celebrity break-up. (But, according to the cover of one of the sleb mags in the newsagent’s George Clooney and Teri Hatcher may be involved in merger talks—denial here.)
Read MoreResponding to the unusually early death of actor Chris Penn, Squander Two writes about acting—and explains much of my problem with (British) theatre: If only Sean Penn were anywhere near as talented as his brother, his films wouldn’t be so irritatingly tedious. Cintra Wilson’s right: truly great acting is something you don’t even notice. That’s […]
Read MoreAs part of a once-in-a-lifetime, two-part breaking of my PooterGeek “No ‘Bloggers’ Memes” rule I answer Eric‘s challenge: “I nominate Normblog and Pootergeek to list two films they like that most people don’t…” but I do so in my own way: Independence Day fails on almost every level as a work of serious cinema; but […]
Read MoreI was recording in Richard’s little studio the other day and he showed me some scenes from a short film he’s doing the music for. (His initial ideas sound excellent and the short not only looks good, but stars Someone Famous Off Telly.) Populated by children’s toys as his and Kate’s home is, I had […]
Read MoreA lot of people have accused you of being a sort of “Blair-lite”. How would you respond to that? Apart from anything else, how do you feel about Mr Blair as a person? Yah, well, y’know Tony was really rather good about my taking over the Conservative Party. He sent me a congratulatory letter and […]
Read MoreKelly Brook is extraordinarily beautiful, but, as anyone who has seen her on TV knows, she’s not going to dazzle you with an informed précis of neo-Kantianism or a layperson’s account of the interesting physical properties of the fullerenes. Because of this you can admire her in the abstract, like the Taj Mahal, say, knowing […]
Read MoreClean-cut “youf” operatic quartet G4‘s cover of Radiohead’s Creep is either a crime against music or a post-modern deflation of passive-aggressive indie rock whining. I’m not sure which, but either way I am worried that my sister likes it and that I can’t think of a good reason why she shouldn’t. “Is It Just Me […]
Read MoreI was asked at a recent party of ‘Bloggers why I don’t write more about Africa and in an email this week by a South African correspondent if I would write something about apartheid. In both cases I pleaded the deadly combination of ignorance and emotion. I just couldn’t write well about a continent I […]
Read More[HARRISON FORD is dressed in an expensive suit. It is crumpled from his being forced to sit on the floor, tied to a pipe in a stainless steel room full of hi-tech equipment. POOTERGEEK enters. He is wearing a collarless grey jacket and matching trousers and carrying a fluffy white CAT. He is not sure […]
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